I am struggling with the exact same situation. We had been talking for six months on Saturday and he also got out of a bad relationship. The advice Eric gave you was phenomenal. It answered all my questions and showed me exactly how to tackle this situation. If you have any more advice for me please I would appreciate it. I was kind of looking for how to proceed, and almost getting to the point where I figured I should just cut it off and save myself the heartache later on.
What a fantastic answer Eric. Excellent, honest, real answer.
I just met this guy not Upto a month,I like him. If he is aggressive then you should just stay away from him, period. Dont even hang out with him as a friend. Leave it alone, for your own safety, and dont make excuses for him because there is no excuse.
Hi Everyone, Pls I need advice. Been seeing this guy for a while, when we first started last year November, he said, he had a girlfriend who went abroad to do a post graduate study. Every time i talk about it he says I should flow with the wind. He has a very unstable character. He Says he likes me , but am beginning to feel like a booty call, the sex is great, cos that is the part of the relationship that works best.
He is secretive nd I never know what goes on in his mind. He used her picture as his profile picture but recently he has stopped. Am thinking of ending the relationship cos am the kind that likes stability and commitment in a relationship. I am noticing a recurring theme with these posts.
No label dating: can you have love without commitment? - BBC Three
Girls or women , we needd to start taking these things at face value, rather than trying to read into them. He means just what you think he says. We need to stop convincing ourselves that these guys are going to change their minds. Ritz, I think you are right to be suspicious and I think you need to go with your gut. He knew he wanted me as his girlfriend by our second date! It turns out the problem was me: I thought if I just stuck around long enough that it would eventually work out.
I ignored my intuition. They never committed and they eventually moved on because that was their plan all along and I was in denial, refusing to hear what they were actually saying! It was so new to me! Can you believe that? Ok, so, been seeing this guy for 2 months now. This guy sounds scary to me. Asking you to move in after only 2 months, but then not committing? This guy is a waste of your time. If you think there is something funny going on about this, there probably is. If you want advice, I think you should leave this guy. Do it before you get too attached.
He wants his cake and to eat it too. It sounds like he wants to keep you all to himself, while leaving himself off the hook so he can see other people. It sounds like a double standard! I agree with you Sally. Thanks for the good advice. Is that not good advice? Still need to find a good guy, but his advice has kept me from letting myself be tied up with bad ones.
At least those who have had problems know what not to do. He is not saying you are his girlfriend because you are NOT his girlfriend. I fell for that before.
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My bf and I were together nights a week and said he loved me all the time. But he would not say I was his girlfriend. I later found it was because it allowed him to cheat guilt free. Distance yourself from this one. He is a waste of time no matter how good it seems at the moment. He is an extended fbuddy who is looking past you to the next. Let him know that because you are not his girlfriend you are keeping your options to meet and date someone who will love to call you his girlfriend — Without asking to do so.
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Completely agree with this comment. Oh I think a guy who really wants you will have no qualms calling you his girlfriend. You are giving him all the benefits of a relationship without any responsibilities whatsoever. Know what I mean? This has happened to me so many times!
The sooner we all start saying NO, the sooner men are going to get the picture that this is unnacceptable and needs to stop! We chose to be exclusive after a couple weeks but never talked about being in an official relationship. I started to feel like I was in emotional purgatory and craved safety and security in our relationship.
So I did…which is now causing me great stress. In a way I can see that I pressured him to make a choice. I find myself becoming distant and introverted in defense of simply wanting him to verbally claim his love to me. How the hell do I move forward in this situation? Just be yourself instead of stressing out and wait for him to contact you for dates.
6 Truths About Being In An Undefined Relationship (From A Girl Who’s In One)
Thank you for responding! I suppose I failed to mention that we are now officially boyfriend and girlfriend after I initiated it. I know why I chose to bring this up but at the same time I regret not holding out a little longer to allow him to make the move. I make time to see him because I want to see him. I do find importance and merit to astrology which is why I mentioned it. There is truth to our signs and how we connect, however and I will always value that. Hi Liz, I am into astrology too, but aside from signs indicating compatibility, there is our free will which is not under the aegis of God or astrology or anything else.
And bottom line, he is either willing to use his free will to commit or not.
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And if not, use your God given free will and move on. How would i go about handling a situation with my ex boyfriend, who is now my boyfriend again, where yes, we got back together 2 months ago but he still has not told a single soul that we are officially back together?